Rants


I just got around to filing my 2003 and 2004 income taxes. I didn’t make much during those years, but boy I’m paying for it. Now I know enough to know enough not to do my own tax reporting. I take my receipts, statements and stuff and plop them down on my Accountant’s desk. You know what she does? She thanks me. I think she is crazy. Just crazy.

One problem with having someone else do your income tax reporting is that they want you to pay them to do it. I have both typical and non-typical income and expenses for a micro business. My returns aren’t too complicated, but I would hate to see how long it would take for me to do them myself.

On average I am paying about $1,200 per year for my returns. The problem is the procrastination. With three years to do instead of one, I’ll be paying for these three returns and that means this month is the last month I can do substantial rehabilitation on my main business, the Sun Valley Mobile Home Community. For the rest of this year I will see most of my expenses go toward income tax compliance costs.

Note that I mentioned compliance costs, not income taxes. When all the dust settles, I rarely make enough money that I owe income taxes. I live comfortably enough, but on a very low income. The community needs a lot of repairs and maintenance and much of my cash goes to it instead of me.

If I didn’t have to report my income, I probably wouldn’t keep any records. After all, what would be the need? True, it would be easier to sell the property with good records and good accounting eases management, but I’m a procrastinator and I know I wouldn’t be keeping records if I didn’t have to.

I simply remember my favorite things …

What a day. I pulled the deck plate off my garden tractor for the third time in two days and the PTO makes more noise now than it did yesterday. It’s been a dismal, fruitless, expensive day and I really need to remember my favorite things.

Puppy Dogs and kittens. Not much for the grownup animals, but I love those little ones.

Love. Yesterday, a clerk from the hardware store asked if I was married. She then informed me she was engaged, but there seemed a little interest there. She says I make her laugh.

Convenience. I need to bring the tractor into the shop tomorrow. I aided my own self some by loading the tractor up today. So, it’s good to know I can bring the mower in first thing tomorrow without first having to load it in the truck.

Clean clothes. My clothes came back today. Just after I took a nice hot shower. I usually have to wait a few days for my clothes. The lady next door washes them weekly for $5 and returns them when she can. I only have four real shirts. My real shirts are pull over with V-necks. Since I am stuck with taking prednisone (a cortico steroid) for the rest of my life, I have no neck. My head and the glands at the just got bigger and bigger until my neck disappeared.

Screaming children. I love to here the girls outside screaming and having fun.

Comfort. I just rubbed fragrance free moisturizer on my feet and covered them with socks. I massaged my much neglected toes while I was there. It still feels grand. All warm and cozy.

Lasagna. I love lasagna.

Reading. I love to read a nice book on a cool day.

Thin and sexy. I don’t have any snack food in the house. Well, no chips anyway. So, I can’t pig out on chips for instant gratification. I did eat some french fries with ketchup. Or was that some ketchup with french fries. Either way I am almost full and there is pasta cooking in the microwave.

Rent free. I don’t pay rent or a house note. I have a mortgage, but it is on a mobile home park and paid by my corporation. I live smack dab in the middle of it and don’t charge myself $180 per month in lot rent. I bought the old run down mobile I live in for cash and need only pay the bribe property taxes, electric and propane for it.

No itching. The increased prednisone levels completely stop the itching of all the Poison Ivy rash I have on my neck and arm. This is very good because the increased dosage also makes my emotions go nuts. Yesterday, I started crying in the parking lot of the lawn mower repair shop, after thinking of a plot for a book I haven’t read in years (A Cat of a Silvery Hue). Today I yelled “Damn!” at the absolute top of my lungs and I can be very loud.

Gazebos. I love gazebos.

I just turned the thermostat to 74 degrees F. Oh, it’s good to the King!

I just got off the phone with a client. We have an excellent relationship. It’s close but not exactly like an old marriage. We fight and makeup and celebrate at different times of the year. She is just as opinionated as I am and we wound up the conversation shortly after I asked if she was closed today.

She said she didn’t think “those people” should be so ungrateful. After all, we provide so much for them. Then she asked how I felt about immigration. I first said she really didn’t want to know. After a moment I gave in. Here’s how I see it.

As sson as a person steps across the border they should be Americans (assuming that is what they want). No tests. No waiting period. No paperwork. Just enter the country. That’s it. If you really think you need to vote or to collect Social Insecurity feel free to go fill out some paperwork. All I had to do is be born in this country. What kind of an asshole would I be if I made someone else jump through hoops to be a citizen here.

On technical email lists this is especially helpful. If a poster asks more than one question, it becomes almost necessary to use bottom posting. The experienced top poster is not phased. He or she will have no problem answering multiple questions by simply writing them out and leaving the duplicates in the unedited section below their reply.

Bottom posting makes it easier to follow a conversation. It is especially easy to read after the thread gets large. Because of all the editing the reader is not reading the same passages repeatedly. They also know precisely which part of a previous post is being replied to. In complicated messages it is easier to spot who said what and to whom a reply is for.


No virus found in this incoming message.
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Bottom posting involves editing a post such that only the most relevant information remains and then answering those relevant sections below that section. One thing you seldom find in a bottom posted message is repeated nonsense text. Like this text which came from the message I was sent.

I have run across quite a few excuses for not bottom posting. My favorite is that MS OUtlook places the cursor at the top of the message. So, if the programmers at Microsoft were to jump off a bridge …

In honor of these top posters, I decided to reverse this rant. If you find it hard to read, you’re probably not top-posting enough. Experience shows that many many people won’t have any problem reading this at all.

I received an email today. It was a copy of a conversation which someone knew would be interesting to me. At one point, each poster accuses the other of not knowing English. Here’s a thread where each poster placed their reply on top of the statements of the lase poster and they are worried about the use of grammar and languages.

I just had the most interesting conversation with the Tax Man. I am two years behind on filing my returns and the IRS is rightfully concerned. Almost all my income comes through Clarkson Energy Homes, Inc. (CEH) and passes to me as income. CEH is an S corporation which allows distribution of non social security income to me.

I was a little shocked when the Tax Man said he expected all income to be reported as W2 income. He said an officer of the company should be paid a salary and that he should receive W2 income. To hide my dismay and to avoid an argument I said, “I didn’t know that. I thought income could be passed to me through an S corporation without a need for W2 income. I guess I should speak with my accountant about this.”

He replied that without W2 earnings I would not be paying into Social Security or Medicare. I took a few deep breaths while looking at the phone receive like it was going to bite. Finally, I said “Oh that sounds bad.” I swear I kept the calm in my voice.

Why in the freaking hell would anyone find motivation from joining Social Security and Medicare? Yes, Mr. Tax Man I want to be a good little Socialist too. It’s my Patriotic Duty to follow every stupid lame government program that comes down the pike.

I have often read that you should only follow the written advice of IRS representatives. That oral advice should never be considered. This makes sense since you cannot blame the IRS for poor oral advice. But this a Revenue Officer. I would assume he had the first clue about how we use corporations to avoid taxes as much as possible. True, he probably assumed a late filer was not the most sophisticated tax dodger, but to suggest that all distributions be filed as W2 income. Oh Brother!

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